Early Morning Rain

It’s not raining so much as pouring. The clouds are low, as well – I can only see as far as about 26th St. or so up the hill (I’m at 19th.) There are no mountains to be seen.

Last night I got free passes to the premiere screening of Sharkwater, a documentary about Sharks by a guy named Rob Stewart from Toronto. It was very, very good, and also very, very disturbing. Adam came out of it thoroughly depressed. I recommend seeing it simply because it is good to know what’s happening in this world, and because conservation isn’t always about saving the soft cuddly animals like pandas and baby seals.

Personally, I walked out of the film with feeling the message that an individual can make a difference, contrary to messages I’ve received for much of my life… not from movies, but from people around me when I was growing up, who already felt defeated and figured that meant they couldn’t do anything. No, movies like to tell us we can do anything – I just rarely believe their message. The fact that I saw this movie in a packed theatre, with people watching all knowing that it’s a documentary and not a scary shark horror film and still wanting to see it, is one part of that. The content of the film itself is another.

Yes, I was as disturbed as Adam. It’s strange, lately, how we’ve switched places – at one time, he would have come out of that focussing on the positive things, however few they might be. Instead I’m the one doing that, and he’s depressed and hating humanity. I just don’t know how to handle it.

We went home in silence after a brief discussion; one where I felt useless to communicate my thoughts, either because I wasn’t saying it right or because he wasn’t listening to what I was trying to say. I gave up trying to say anything, came home, curled up on the couch and fell asleep by 9:30. He went and played Battlefield 2142. I got up again at midnight, went to see him briefly, and then crawled into bed. I have no idea when he came to bed. I was up by 8:00, however, which is somewhat nice since I have today off and I usually hate wasting my days off by sleeping. I’ll just let him sleep until he wakes up… he has today off too.